First date: How far do you go

27 Feb

Figuring out how far you will go on a first date is something most people already have in mind when they make the date. To be honest this idea of how far a person is willing to go is something individual, in constant flux, and varies greatly on several factors which will be explored. There is no right or wrong answer to this dilemma as the only person that can make this decision is the person going on the date, usually the woman. With that said, even the ladies have times the decide to go all the way only to get shot down and left laying at the end of the runway in a twisted mass of wreckage. As such, why not have some fun looking at this issue.

 Men and women look at the question of how far they will go on the first date in very different ways. For women it is often a process of deliberation. It generally always begins at “No way under the sun” and slowly progresses upwards based on several factors:

How much effort will he put in to creating the perfect date?

Will he succeed in pulling off that perfect date he planned?

Is he going to act in a socially respectable manner?

Will he cringe if I order a second lobster to go?

Does he throw his hands up in disgust when I ask for a whole cheesecake to go as well? A dessert is needed after the lobster.

Is he absolutely irresistible?

How long has it been since I’ve had a roll in the hay?

While some women may tweak that list a little, it is a fair assessment o some of the things that may go through the mind of a woman when she creates her mental checklist of how far she is going to let you go on the first date. Some factors obviously weigh more than others, but those are individual preferences. Some women have a far more detailed and lengthy checklist of what it takes to determine how far they will go on the first date. The thing to remember is that everything may fly out the window if the final point, “how long has it been since I had a roll in the hay?” has been a really long time. Women are sexual beings as much men, almost every single woman that has been single long enough will sometimes overlook everything else just to clear that off her to do list.

When looking at men and how they determine how far they will go on the first date it is far simpler. Their only criteria usually consists of whether or not the woman will say yes to sex. They will often go as far as they are allowed whether it is the first date or 101st date. Before people start throwing rocks, not all men are like that. Some men do genuinely consider whether sex on the first date is their goal or whether they are more interested in getting to know someone on a personal conversational level with perhaps a sweet goodnight kiss or maybe a little cuddling.

While the above makes light of the issue to some degree, most people can readily admit that they have had similar thoughts when deciding how far they will go on the first date. The most important thing for anyone to determine is how comfortable they are with their date beforehand, how far they feel going based on that, and then sticking to it no matter how charming they may seem or how much you may feel like going for more. Gut instincts are respected for a reason, that being that they are often correct. Far too many men and women have gone farther than their initial plan on the first date only to be heartbroken afterward when things go sour. If you can handle that disappointment and know you are safe and in control of the situation, you can decide to go as far as you want on the first date partner willing. If not, stick the the the four date rule coined by Elliot Reid on Scrubs, “It’s one date longer than a slut, one date shorter than a prude.”

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