Debunking stereotypes about gay and lesbian relationships

13 Jan

Gay and lesbian couples are some of the misunderstood pairings on the planet for good reason; society in general has perpetuated myths about them which have permeated nearly every means of communication whether it be verbal, written, or visual. We see stereotypes about these types of relationships on television and in the movies, read about them in all forms of literature, and often these relationships are used as the punchline of jokes. The practice has continued so long that the stereotypes over time began finding acceptance as fact through nothing more than sheer repetition. What are they though and how can they be disproved?

One of the common myths is that even though a couple is the same sex that one must fill the role of the wife and the other the husband. This is untrue, because how do you define what the role of a husband, wife, mother, or father is? Even in heterosexual marriages the lines blur as to these roles. Does a man that does housework in a heterosexual relationship automatically get tabbed as the wife? Does a woman that handles finances somehow become the husband? Of course not. A couple is two people, two separate individuals that complement each other in a relationship. This stereotype only exists because it is based on equally novel stereotypes.

Another rather idiotic myth is that gay relationships are all about the sex. Again, this is just silly. If you were to believe the stereotypes every gay couple is engaged in nightly Roman orgies, so much so that it would be nearly impossible for them to do anything else. The fact is gay couples have no more or less sex than straight couples. They have lives which require everything a heterosexual couple does like paying bills, holding down jobs, shopping, raising their children in more and more cases, running errands, maintaining a home, and all the other little things that come with a normal life. In between all that there really isn’t time for all kinds of wild and crazy sex parties, or even an abnormally active sex life. Simple logic dictates it just isn’t reasonable to believe that.

One of the most disgusting stereotypes is that gay couples only want children so they can appear “normal”, use them to recruit new members, try to make the child itself gay, or in the most twisted of minds exploit their children for their own personal gratification. For starters, gay couples are normal even if they are not the majority of the population. They are regular people that have a regular relationship aside from one thing which is that they have that with a member of the same sex.

The idea they use their children to recruit others, especially other children is ludicrous. Gay couples just don’t think that way, nor do they try to force their children to be gay. All they want for their children is to be happy well adjusted kids. Ask a gay couple if they hope their own child is gay and most will say no. They don’t provide that answer because they are ashamed of being gay, they do so because they know how narrow minded much of society is and how hard being openly gay is in many places. They don’t want their children to have to deal with that. Furthermore there never has been any gay recruiting drive. Have you ever had gay couples appear at your door with kids in tow telling you how wonderful being gay is and asking if they can come in to talk to you about switching sides? Have they ever stopped you on the street asking if can give you some literature about gay families and why you should consider turning gay? Of course not, because gay couples do not recruit, nor do they use their children to.

Most disturbing and disgusting is the stereotype that gay couples only have children to exploit them for their own carnal desires. This is simply disgusting twisted thinking that makes you actually have to question the people that would actually believe it. Gay couples are not tag team pedophiles looking to abuse their children. Statistically speaking by percentage a pedophile is more likely to be a heterosexual. This stereotype only exists because people that oppose gay couples or their being parents are willing to resort to the most vile base tactics necessary to achieve their goals. There have been gay couples that abused their children, there is no denying that, but there have been far more heterosexual couples that have done the same. The difference is when a gay couple does it it makes national headlines, when a heterosexual couple does this it might find its way to the news. Just might.

Gay couples do not just “settle” for each other because it is their only option. The fact s most gays and lesbians easily attract members of the opposite sex and are in fact often some of the most physically and intellectually desirable people around. A gay relationship is not based on being ‘all they could do” it is based on their attraction for a person that is the same sex. You can’t convince too many people that Portia di Rossi or perhaps James Dean couldn’t have their pick of opposite sex persons if that was their true attraction.

Stereotypes only exist because people either do not understand something or because they do not want to understand something. The fact is far too many people do not want to understand or accept that gay couples are really no different from heterosexual couples. While their reasons for that may vary, accepting stereotypes as truth makes this convenient for them. It is sad people think that way, even sadder when they pass them on to others, but it is a fact of life and something which can only be lessened by debunking one stereotype at a time one person at a time.

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